


The Scent Of Love

by WhyAreAllUsernamesTaken



Series: We either make it, or break it. [30]
Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Jisung owns a flowershop, Kissing, Light Angst, M/M, Post-Break Up, Sad, Sad Ending, Sad Han Jisung | Han
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-28
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-19 04:48:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29745228
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhyAreAllUsernamesTaken/pseuds/WhyAreAllUsernamesTaken
Summary: It's been months but it still hurts, no matter how much Jisung tries to hide away between his flowers.Then one afternoon, he comes face to face with Minho and everything he has been trying to forget.--‘’Whenever I see those I can only think of how you always had a bunch of them in a vase in your room…,’’ The guy almost mumbles, ‘’or how you would give me a single one almost every day,’’Jisung doesn’t dare turn around and kinda wishes his mind had made up the words, but something tells him that it isn’t an auditory illusion. He doesn’t know which would be better.
Relationships: Han Jisung | Han/Lee Minho | Lee Know
Series: We either make it, or break it. [30]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1439083
Comments: 5
Kudos: 37





	The Scent Of Love

**Author's Note:**

> Ghostly Kisses - J'ai demandé à la lune ft. Louis-Étienne Santais

‘’Those have always been your favourite,’’

Jisung stills at that and sucks in a sharp breath, clutching the flowers in his hands tighter; a small amount of light pink baby’s breath. They are indeed his favourite, hence why he has taken some time during the slow morning to pick a couple to arrange with some white roses that had been delivered.

‘’Whenever I see those I can only think of how you always had a bunch of them in a vase in your room…,’’ The guy almost mumbles, ‘’or how you would give me a single one almost every day,’’

Jisung doesn’t dare turn around and kinda wishes his mind had made up the words, but something tells him that it isn’t an auditory illusion. He doesn’t know which is better.

He has missed that voice, so much so that he has ached to hear him again. That doesn’t mean that right now he is happy he has gotten what he wished for because his flower shop is one of the places he feels safest and right now it isn’t. Right now he feels like his peace has been ripped away from him, making way for a hurtful thumping in his chest.

It’s scary how easy it is to fall back and he already had to try to keep his eyes from watering. 

Only now he notices that the sweet smell of flowers floating through the shop has come to carry a tinge of mint, a smell that throws him right back to freshly washed blankets and trips to the ice-cream shop and hot tea on cold evenings. All of those come hand-in-hand with airy laughing and sparkling eyes and cold hands on his skin and so much more.

Jisung wants to run away. He isn’t ready for this and doesn’t think he’ll ever be, but there’s something tugging at his heart. It’s want and a bittersweet nostalgia that are battling his rationale. 

Like so often happens, his heart wins against his head and he slowly turns around.

Minho is standing there, his smile clearly an unsure one, but he still looks as beautiful as Jisung remembers. Maybe even more, if that is even possible. And that hurts. It hurts to see that Minho looks even better than before, like Jisung is the only one who misses the past and still bears the remnants of it.

But then again, it’s not like Jisung wanted this. 

He belatedly observes that the red is gone and now Minho’s hair is a caramel brown, soft and fluffy. Jisung thinks it brings out the older’s eyes a bit more. It makes him look a lot softer and it fits his personality better. Or well, the side Jisung was blessed to witness and see more than other people.

Does Minho have someone new who he shows that side of himself?

‘’Yeah,’’ Jisung replies dumbly after a long while, looking back down at the flower in his hand when he sees Minho’s gaze locking onto the necklace around the younger’s neck.

It’s a simple one, a tiny red gemstone, roughly cut and dangling from a dainty silver chain. From what he knows, it wasn’t exactly expensive but Jisung has never been able to throw it away. Maybe that’s stupid, but he has tried a couple of times over the last few months and just wasn’t able to do it so he has given up.

For some reason it makes him feel caught and a little pathetic, especially when Minho lets out a heavy sigh and runs his hand through his hair. It’s something the older does when he isn’t sure what to say even though he has a lot to say. Jisung knows that all too well but it’s a first he doesn’t know what that exactly _means_.

The gesture is also one Jisung has come to associate with a lot of hurtful words and it makes him feel so small. Minho still holds the ability to absolutely crush him if he wants to. Always had, probably always will.

It makes Jisung feel so, so pathetic. 

They stand there in awkward silence long enough for Jisung to start feeling suffocated. It’s a mix of sadness, anxiety and something vaguely bitter. _Fear_ , because Jisung is scared of what will come out of Minho’s mouth, if the older will even speak at all.

He guesses it’s the side effect of the last conversation they had had, a rather short one and totally one-sided. Jisung hadn’t been able to say anything back. Till this day he regrets not speaking up but at the time he had felt incredibly hurt and heartbroken and totally unable to utter a single word.

What would he have said anyways? What can one say? 

Jisung likes to think he’s confident and that nothing can touch him, but that’s only because deep down he knows damn well how easy it is for words or actions to ruin him. 

Anyways, the weird tension keeps building and building and even though Jisung’s brain screams at him to get out, he can’t move. It’s like he’s stuck in place and he hates it. He hates how he has been doing so well but merely seeing the older and hear him speak a couple of words is enough for his anxiety to spike. He notices in the way his fingers start to tremble and how all sound is slowly fading away. 

Despite the stressing out – or maybe because of it – Jisung feels his mind drifting off somewhere he can’t reach. Deep down he knows that isn’t good, but the momentary escape makes his chest ache a lot less.

The less fun effect is that his limbs start to feel like jello and _foreign_ to his body and all he can do is watch on as the little bouquet of flowers slip from his fingers and to the floor, like he’s watching _someone else_ drop them and in slow motion.

They hit the floor with a soft thud, one Jisung can barely hear over the blood rushing through his ears.

It’s a nice floor, made of shiny marble and Jisung likes to pretend he’s skating around the slippery surface whenever he’s opening and has to mop the floor. Sometimes he wishes he had taken figure skating a lot more serious because suddenly he misses it after close to ten years. 

Maybe he can sign up for lessons again? That would be fun. And if he played his cards right, he might even be able to drag Felix along with him. Felix would probably like it. Not the cold because he came from Australia and somehow still has to get used to the winters in Korea after all these years.

Wait, what was he doing again?

His limbs feel weird and his head does too, kinda funny.

It’s even weirder when hands cup his cheeks and guide his head up, Jisung easily complying because he simply isn’t in control.

Minho’s expression turns increasingly worried and Jisung’s doesn’t like that. 

It’s enough to somehow make him snap back and when he does, he swats Minho’s hands away from him probably a bit too harshly. 

‘’I’m fine. Don’t worry about it,’’ he mumbles, making sure to push the older back a bit.

Minho looks sceptical and of course he is; the older has seen it happen a couple of times before and is very observant. However, all he does is nod and for some reason it stings. 

Right.

It’s not like the older cares anymore. Probably never really has. 

Then his mind spirals down and everything gets corrupted. Every loving smile and reassurance. But the thing is, is that he isn’t sure whether he’s making up the annoyed sighs and brushing off or if he really hadn’t noticed Minho doing that before.

He’s so out of it that when he feels his head coming somewhat down to earth, he finds lips pressed against his. 

It’s strange and he doesn’t understand but that all doesn’t matter.

Once again, the heart wins and Jisung’s arms find their way around Minho’s neck at the same time he feels arms carefully wrap around his waist. 

Despite what his mind had just made him think, the feeling of the older is familiar in a way that makes him hopeful and bittersweet butterflies erupt. 

Minho’s still just as warm and gentle and tastes like coffee and holds him tightly against him. Jisung has missed it all and realises he really wasn’t as over the older as he had made himself think. 

And maybe… maybe Minho has missed him too?

However, before Jisung can get too hopeful, Minho suddenly stops like he has been hit by lightning and backs off.

‘’I… I’m sorry,’’ Minho whispers against his lips before he backs off, ‘’I shouldn’t have done that,’’

Jisung feels his heart drop.

He has let himself get hurt _again_. Does he ever learn?

For months and months he has tried to get over this and it had been two steps forward, one step back. This is not helping him at all and maybe he had made fifteen steps forward in total, but this makes him stumble all the way back to zero.

It’s laughable how stupid he is and he lets out a dry chuckle, tilting his head up and blinking away the already building tears. God does he hate himself for being so weak and emotional. 

‘’It’s cool,’’ he replies, his voice strangely distant to his own ears, ‘’It’s me who is dumb. I shouldn’t have expected anything from someone like you. Not now, not before,’’

It’s not really what he wants to say – what does he even want to get across with that? - but he is hurt, _again_ , and all he knows is how to deal with things like that is either deflect or fly into space. He has already done the latter so it’s an easy pick.

Minho looks offended and Jisung almost apologizes because he hadn’t meant to hurt the older even if a small part of him wants to. He doesn’t. Instead, he brings his trembling fingers up to the little claps of the necklace on the back of his neck.

It takes a couple of tries but then it’s off and he reaches out for Minho’s hand. The older surprisingly lets him and Jisung turns his hand.

‘’Leave,’’ Jisung mumbles as he lets the necklace drop in Minho’s palm, ‘’You’re good at that anyways,’’

Dammit.

It’s like his tongue has a mind of his own. 

‘’I don’t remember you being such an asshole,’’ Minho bites back.

Jisung feels his cheeks flush with anger and his eyes seriously tears up. He presses his blunt fingernails into his palm, looking Minho right in the eye for the first time in weeks, ‘’I learned from the best,’’

Its seemingly the last straw and Minho actually growls, ‘’I’m glad I got rid of you and your stupid problems, always ruined everything,’’

Jisung breathing hitches and he feels the colour drain out of his face at that as the first tears spill over.

It’s like an actual stab in the heart because Minho knows damn well he has brought up a very sensitive topic, used it as an insult. And not once had Jisung thought the older would do so. If there was someone who had been there when he had a bad day, one where he would cry as soon as he woke up, it was Minho. 

But now Minho has made it sound like Jisung is some kind of lost cause. Like he always had been in Minho’s eyes. Maybe the older had only seen him as a charity case and dipped out when he didn’t feel like investing in it anymore. He did have a thing for picking up stray cats… Jisung was probably just one of them.

Even worse; Minho loves his cats to death but not Jisung, so that says enough.

The dam breaks.

‘’I hate you,’’ the younger sobs and he takes a step back, ‘’You didn’t have to rub it in how you have always thought of me. I’m very well aware I was probably just some project for you to work on until you got tired of it,’’

Slowly but surely the fury seems to seep away from Minho and the older soon looks distressed, regretful, and is already reaching out for the younger.

‘’W-wait, Jisung, I-,’’

‘’What did I ever see in you?,’’ Jisung interrupts through another heavy sob, truly baffled, ‘’I was so hesitant but you got me to trust you, told me that it would be okay to fall in love with you, you got me to tell you things I had never told anyone else. How could I have let that happened?,’’

Minho clearly wants to reach out but doesn’t and Jisung is left to his own devices, shoulders shocking as he tries to take proper breaths and stop sobbing his eyes out.

‘’Jisung, don’t cry. I’m sorry. Hyung’s really sorry okay?,’’

‘’It’s best if you go Minho-ssi,’’ Jisung replies once he finally is able to somewhat speak, ‘’Last time I checked, depression is indeed very contagious and _ruins everything_ so I wouldn’t want to infect you,’’

Minho winces but recovers quickly and reaches over the tiny wooden counter behind Jisung. Before he knows it, the older is scribbling something down.

‘’Here,’’ he says hesitantly as he reaches out a post-it with a series of numbers, ‘’For if you ever need someone to call or something,’’

Jisung finds himself staring at the piece of paper and almost bursts out in tears again. Why is Minho doing this? Can he please stop giving him false hope? Hasn’t he done enough damage?

‘’Please don’t do this to me,’’ Jisung pleads tiredly, pushing Minho’s hand with the post-it away, ‘’Just go and let me be alone, please,’’

Stubbornness is something they’ve always had in common, but Minho more so than Jisung so it’s a little bit of a surprise when Minho merely nods and crumples the note in his hand.

‘’I… I’ll stop by next week,’’ is all the older says before turning on his heel.

But before he walks away, he hangs the necklace he still had in his hand on a sturdy plant on the display table next to them. 

Then there is fading footsteps and the ding of the little bell above the door and gone he is. 

Jisung is left trading there in the silence with beautiful flowers, aching lungs, painful throbbing in his heart and a cursed necklace he can’t seem to get rid of.

And as Minho waits at the bus stop right across the street, he watches as Jisung turns the little sign to ‘closed’ and sinks to the floor. Minho’s heart aches when he sees the boy crouched into a little ball, head tucked away behind his knees and arms tightly wrapped around his legs.

He has always thought Jisung looks small and has always had a soft spot for that, but this time he looks vulnerable and hurt like a injured animal. And that’s the older’s fault. Why had he fucked up so much? He hadn’t even meant half the things he had said that one night in his dorm, but he also hadn’t been brave enough to own up to it.

But he had come here to try, to try and see if things were still fixable and to make sure to keep his promise. Although now he isn’t sure whether all promises should be fulfilled.

He tries not to think about how he had ruined it all by once again saying things he didn’t mean.

Maybe things are just not meant to be. Maybe Minho is just not fit for this even though he had thought he was. 

His bus pulls up and obstructs his view of the boy and it keeps him from rushing back to Jisung. It’s something he really wants to do but is scared to. 

Seems like he’s still a coward, no matter how brave he thought himself to be for coming here today. 

_’’Minho?,’’ Jisung mumbles, face tucked away in the older’s neck._

_The older hums as he cards his fingers through Jisung’s hair, his eyes focussed on the book in his right hand._

_‘’I think I know what I want to do after I graduate,’’ Jisung announces as he comes out of hiding, big brown eyes sparkling as he cranes his head to look at Minho._

_Minho drops his hand with the open book on the bed and turns to look at his boyfriend, ‘’That’s still two years away for you Hannie, but shoot,’’_

_‘’I want to open a flower shop,’’ the boy whispers like it’s a very important secret, eyes twinkling in excitement when he pushes himself up to hoover over the older, ‘’Because flowers are nice and pretty and can make other people feel very happy. I want to be able to help people be happy, even if it’s in such a small way,’’_

_Minho chuckles and whispers back, ‘’That sounds like something you’d like. It’s a great idea sweetheart,’’_

_Jisung smiles widely and leans down to leave a quick peck on Minho’s cheekbone._

_‘’You’ll be there for the opening right?,’’_

_‘’Of course love, no matter what,’’ Minho nods, ‘’And if for some reason I can’t make it on opening day itself, I’ll make sure to come as soon as possible,’’_

_Jisung beams and suddenly shifts his weight so he can hold out his pinkie._

_‘’Pinkie-promise?,’’_

_Minho laughs, endeared, and hooks his own pinkie with the younger’s, ‘’Pinkie-promise,’’_

_Jisung giggles happily and dips down again to press a kiss against his lips, lingering there for a little while before backing up again._

_‘’I’ll hold you to that babe,’’_


End file.
